Happy 3 Year Anniversary to this handsome fella and myself!
It is crazy to think that all this started when you talked to me for the first time in the food line at a charity event and look where we are now! It has been a wonderful 3 years filled with ups and downs, learning experiences and fun adventures just like any other relationship, but a little bit different than some because we are interracial dating. Though Chris and I have SO MUCH in common when it comes to interests, hobbies, views and dislikes, we are complete polar opposites when it comes to our ethnicity, how we were raised, our social economics, language and our culture. Yet somehow we are perfect for each other!
By the year 2050 according to National Geographic the face of an average American will be mixed and it will be norm. (LINK HERE) Meaning that American will truly become the ultimate melting pot and it will show in it’s people. Though this is the future of our country I still rarely come across other interracial couples but it could also be that I currently live in the Midwest. Just like any other couples you have your obstacles but a few extra ones are added into the mix when you’re interracial dating, so here are the top 3 things I have learned so far…
You’re Always Explaining Something– So being the token Mexican friend in my group of college friends I always found myself explaining my culture and traditions to others and by now my friends know A LOT about the Mexican culture thanks to me. When you first start dating anyone you go through the whole get to know each other phase as well as with their friends and family but somehow in interracial dating it seems like it never stops. What I mean by this is as you grow as a couple you will always be learning more about each other but because you might be one of the only people in your family or group of friends dating someone from a whole different culture/ethnicity, you will be the one educating them on your significant other’s life, traditions, etc. You will always get questions asking why they do or do not do certain things that are a norm to everyone around you and where you grew up or why they might think or act certain way. I will say that this has made Chris and I more aware of how our background has helped shaped the way we think, act and react towards others, each other and in certain situations.
Not Everyone Will Understand You– Chris and I have always said that when it comes to us, we are perfect but when you throw other people into our mix that’s when things sometimes can get a little tricky. Meaning just because we are accepting of each other and can see the other’s point of view, it doesn’t mean that others can and will too. This kinda falls in line with always having to explain things about your significant other to people but, knowing that though you might be educating them on everything they still might not get it. At the end of the day we have learned that as long we have each other’s back and are surrounded by our loved ones then life is pretty great!
Traditions Matter– When you collide two different cultures you get two whole different tradition. Which means you gotta learn about them, participate in them and at the end of the day figure out which ones work for both of you to keep together or as an individual. It is safe to say that we have both gone to each other’s family (and friend) functions and have been like well this is the first time I’ve done this or can you explain to me why… Now I’m not saying you have to do everything the other did growing up or like all the traditional foods they ate as a kid (Chris actually doesn’t like Mexican candy) but you gotta try everything at least once before you knock it, but don’t stop doing something just because the other won’t.
The beautiful thing about traditions is that when you find your significant other you can begin to create your own together and embrace them. Chris has gone one step further and is in the process of learning Spanish to be able to talk to my family and so we can become a bilingual household. How great is he?!
So here is to 3 great year together and a lifetime to go!
Photos: Kam Kodaks
Great post! I can definitely relate, as a Mexican American I find myself doing the same, lol.
Author
I’m so happy you could relate too!
Well said!
My fiancé and I are always learning something new about each other. But I’m really lucky that he remembered most of his HS Spanish lessons and is fluent in speaking and writing in Spanish.
I’m excited for our children to grow up with both traditions!!
Author
I don’t know how I just realized this was you Abby! Chris is learning Spanish and the goal is to eventually be a fluent bilingual household. I’m happy you could relate to this 🙂
What a beautiful couple! Thank you so much for your open and honest post. I was in an interracial relationship but the guy I was dating said he couldn’t handle the pressure he was getting from others for being with someone outside of his race so he ended things. You definitely have an amazing guy in your life that is willing to bridge the gap while creating something new and beautiful with you. I hope to find someone as supportive as that but until then I’ll just celebrate your love along with all your fans 🙂 Congrats!
Author
Hi Stephanie! Thank you so much for stopping by and for sharing your story. I’m sorry things did not work out but I truly appreciate the love you have for us! 🙂
Y’all are super cute!!! And I have a friend who is also in an interracial relationship and she has shared a lot of the same things about it.
Author
Lots of things can be different but it also makes it fun!